Aa
Am I overreacting
I've been dating my girlfriend for almost a year. However I'm unsure if I should continue to see her and I will give you some examples as to why.
I enjoy martial arts, guns and motorcycles. She tells me that she is afraid of motorcycles (when she was little a neighbor died) and guidance. However when her boss brought in an UZI (he is a collector) he showed it to her and let her hold it (it was unloaded). She then went on to Facebook and posted that she got to hold an UZI. When she called me on her way home from work she asked if I had been on Facebook and when I said no she told me the story. I felt kind of deflated because I've asked her to come with me to shooting matches or gun range and of course she has declined. Yet here she is at work holding a gun and then posting it on Facebook. When I told her how I felt she said though my feelings were of value it was a silly thing to have bother me.she said posting it kind of as a "can you believe I did this" and that I should not worry about.now what she posted was this "I just held a fully-automatic Uzi. True story." To me it felt like she was all excited over doing it as opposed to a can you believe I did this kind of thing.
Anyway I guess I'm just looking for some feedback to see if in fact I am really overreacting
I enjoy martial arts, guns and motorcycles. She tells me that she is afraid of motorcycles (when she was little a neighbor died) and guidance. However when her boss brought in an UZI (he is a collector) he showed it to her and let her hold it (it was unloaded). She then went on to Facebook and posted that she got to hold an UZI. When she called me on her way home from work she asked if I had been on Facebook and when I said no she told me the story. I felt kind of deflated because I've asked her to come with me to shooting matches or gun range and of course she has declined. Yet here she is at work holding a gun and then posting it on Facebook. When I told her how I felt she said though my feelings were of value it was a silly thing to have bother me.she said posting it kind of as a "can you believe I did this" and that I should not worry about.now what she posted was this "I just held a fully-automatic Uzi. True story." To me it felt like she was all excited over doing it as opposed to a can you believe I did this kind of thing.
Anyway I guess I'm just looking for some feedback to see if in fact I am really overreacting
COMMUNITY LEADER
Well, yes. I do think you are over reacting here. "Holding" a gun is much different than shooting one and going to a shooting range.
I think a couple sharing common interests is a great thing. But . . . my husband and I also have many seperate hobbies and interests. He's Mr. Sports guy which puts me into a coma if forced to watch on tv for more than 5 minutes. He reads the Sports section like he is memorizing every word each and every morning while I rifle through the front page and Local section. If I were really mad at him, one good revenge I could take (which I don't, this is just a hypothetical, of course . . .) would be to hide his Sports Illustrated! He could get back at me by pulling a flower out of my garden claiming he thought it was a weed (which he would probably do because gardening is MY hobby and he has no interest.).
See what I am getting at? As long as you still have things you enjoy together, it is okay that she isn't into some of your hobbies.
Truth be told, I'm ever so slightly a worry wart. And some of the adrenaline things like riding motorcycles would cause me to worry. This is not a bad thing--------- it means she cares, right? So you just assure her that you put safety first. But wanting her to go ride with you? I don't know. It would be nice if she loved it too . . . but I don't. And if my husband did (which he is also a worry wart and afraid he'd kill himself, so doesn't ride)---- well, he'd go do it for an afternoon while I did what I like to do. It wouldn't be a deal breaker for me.
So let this go. The only reason to end this relationship over these things is if you have nothing else in common either. good luck
I think a couple sharing common interests is a great thing. But . . . my husband and I also have many seperate hobbies and interests. He's Mr. Sports guy which puts me into a coma if forced to watch on tv for more than 5 minutes. He reads the Sports section like he is memorizing every word each and every morning while I rifle through the front page and Local section. If I were really mad at him, one good revenge I could take (which I don't, this is just a hypothetical, of course . . .) would be to hide his Sports Illustrated! He could get back at me by pulling a flower out of my garden claiming he thought it was a weed (which he would probably do because gardening is MY hobby and he has no interest.).
See what I am getting at? As long as you still have things you enjoy together, it is okay that she isn't into some of your hobbies.
Truth be told, I'm ever so slightly a worry wart. And some of the adrenaline things like riding motorcycles would cause me to worry. This is not a bad thing--------- it means she cares, right? So you just assure her that you put safety first. But wanting her to go ride with you? I don't know. It would be nice if she loved it too . . . but I don't. And if my husband did (which he is also a worry wart and afraid he'd kill himself, so doesn't ride)---- well, he'd go do it for an afternoon while I did what I like to do. It wouldn't be a deal breaker for me.
So let this go. The only reason to end this relationship over these things is if you have nothing else in common either. good luck
I wouldn't worry about it. As specialmom stated, holding a gun is much different than shooting one. Just accept the fact that you each have different interests, yet enough in common to make it work. Couples do not need to share everything or be passionate about all the same things.
my husband is a womanizer... He gets on FB first thing in the morning and the last thing at night and at work every chance he gets He gets these very young females to be his friends. They are all under 25 and just looking for a good time on the internet but my husband takes it seriously. He is 70!!! I am so fed with it and have given him one last chance to stop. I don't think he is going to stop so I am getting myself ready to leave this kind of life. I want to die in peace. I have heart problems and don't need aymore stress like this.
thanks for letting me vent.
thanks for letting me vent.
COMMUNITY LEADER
Gosh, I am so very sorry. We are supposed to spend the later years in our life content and able to relax and be at peace. I agree, this is good that you are seeking that for yourself. A man who is doing that is acting a fool. I hope he will make changes for you. But you sound capable of having a fine life without him if he can't. Hang in there and again, sorry it has come to this! You DO deserve better!! best of luck
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