What do you mean by the therapist "put you at fault"?
Well, what were you specifically seeking in therapy? If you're seeking to lessen symptoms of PTSD, or anxiety, can you google anxiety or PTSD? To have those strategies be affective, you don't really have to discuss the cause of the anxiety.
Best wishes.
Let me rephrase that. What you need, in therapy, isn't necessarily to rehash who hurt who in a relationship. You need strategies on how to get "unstuck" from this grief, that is likely not grief about the relationship, but is something else and you're referring that grief on this relationship. The fact that you felt better a year after the breakup, is an indication that distress that you're experiencing isn't really caused by this relationship, but something else that you're not realizing and addressing.
First of all, considering suicide in the first place is out of the question, there is nothing LITERALLY NOTHING in this world deserve to make a person suicide, there is a solution for everything but you need go be patient and strong.
About your problem i believe this is what's called " heart break" and in my opinion i think there's something physical inside our bodies that actually gets affected by this sad and depressive events and specially if you were a teenager back then, it's was easier to get hurt and it would keep following you, as an adult you know what's wrong and what's right, you can convince yourself and get over things that bother you but as a teenager it's the first time you face something like this.
I faced something similar in 2016 it was my first and last time i loved a girl, even tho it wasn't actually love i mean we were immature no idea what we are doing nor feeling but i was a teenager and i believed that this was love so it hurt me more then i expected and since then i never wanted more than friendship with girls and i was very clear and straightforward about it but still whenever a girl tries to cross this line it would always bring me back to 2016 i feel ache in my heart like there is emptiness in there and anything related to love would always remind me of her specially of the best moment i had with her i can clearly see her in front of me with every little detail of this moment.
I hope one day you meet a better person that could fill the emptiness in your heart just don't give up and be patient you never know when that person will step in your life.