So I would like to share my story, as I need help getting over this fear, and believing those around me.
In November, I had allowed my boyfriend to finger me with saliva used as lubricant. Two days later I experienced discomfort in my vagina. Thus, triggering a full out panic and anxiety that to this day has not left me, as I am terrified of STDs. I am sixteen years old, and my mother found out the extents of what my boyfriend and I had been doing during a pregnancy scare (completely irrational, I jerked him off and he fingered me while doing so thus getting his precum in my vagina) back in September. I had told her I stopped but I started again with fingerings and jerking him off. So anyways, I freaked out completely and asked her to take me to the doctor, denying that we had done anything sexual since September. After going to the nurse practitioner, she told me since I was not having sex she wasnt concerned about STDs and merely prescribed to me a yeast infection medicine that made symptoms worse. I called, and she gave me a bacterial infection medicine now, which I dont think has helped, but Im also not sure if my anxiety has gotten in the way of thinking clearly. I'm going to see the doctor, and as my friends suggested I'm going to tell her about my anxiety so she can calm me down.
My boyfriend and I are both virgins and have never done anything with anyone else but eachother. However, I have irrational fears that perhaps his father cheated and gave his mother an STD and she never knew about it because she chose to never get tested, and she passed something down to my boyfriend.
I'm terrified constantly. I don't know if I'm going to believe her either, and I dont know how to get out of my head that this is not an STD. Am I alone in thinking this way? What are some ways I can believe the people around me that I do not have one. I don't know anymore how to make myself believe experts and I fear a constant cycle of anxiety and never getting better.